lucy (a_sad_sad_soul) wrote in poetic_cuts,

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i'm slipping....

i haven't written in a while because i haven't really had the motivation to do anything at all. after my suicide attempt mike wanted me to try and stop cutting, so i tried. i haven't cut since that event, but everyday that i'm not cutting i'm getting more upset. i'm slipping away. i need to cut again, but i dont want mike to know about it. is that wrong? my medication has stopped working. i'm becoming more and more depressed, my OCD and anxiety are off the walls. i used to do things in sets of four and i'm finding myself again locking the door four times, washing my hands four times, turning the car lights on four times. my OCD is comming back. also i can't sleep in my room anymore because i've convinced myself that there is an imbred in my closet. and i mean i'm literally convinced, i can't even go into my room alone. i'm freaking out completely. and also to make things better, on monday mike went to go visit his dad until this sunday so he's not guna be around until sunday. i'm slipping. i can't take it anymore!! i need to cut again!! i'm scared that if i dont cut soon then i'm going to flip out completely go over the edge. i want to cut to the point where i can see bone. all the way through my wrists. I'M SLIPPING!! HELP ME!!!
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